還債還債還債還債!
囧囧英語長評一篇！
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The story that fascinated me like no others has very interesting characters who gave life to the dynamic storyline of a warring chronicle. From rise to fall, from acceptance to rebirth, main character Zhao Yan engaged his audience in a vibrant narrative with his witty personality, kind nature, and most importantly, selfless longing for a better world. There has not been a single moment in which I did not cherish and admire his bravery and determination; there has not been a single moment in which I was not brought to tears by his self-sacrifice, or the seemingly self-destruction to achieve his goals; and there has not been another fictional character who made me smile when he smiles, made me cry when he cries, or made me hurt inside as much as I care about him like a dear friend.

The story began with Zhao Yan standing on top of the political hierarchy. A well known warlord across the Middle Kingdom, he had nothing standing in his way to all he desires, may it be power or wealth. He’s down-to-earth gorgeous, and every inch of him exudes confidence. He’s a born leader yet maintains a likable quality that draws everyone towards him. Those near to him greatly respect him for his ingenious mind and genuinely admire him like a brother. He really was standing on top of the world with everything he’s ever wanted. Therefore the sudden demise, betrayal, and lost of self-identity became such heavy blows.

The first book is filled with sinister plots that head toward a single common goal: Zhao Yan’s death. Because of his talent and underlying threat, various sides shared the mutual agreement that vows to deliver his catastrophic downfall. Yet reading through his perspective we readers are often blinded by his cheerful tone which hides the heaviness in the story. However, his positive mentality still did not prevent him from choosing to end his life, after the near-death coup planned by his brother. His pride, dream, and self-identity were completely crushed. The brief encounter with Jiang Yuan prior to the tragic events in the first book did not allow him to form a strong enough bond (although the reverse was true for Jiang) to the man who would later become his biggest emotional support.

Miraculously, he survived, with a broken body, and a broken heart. Resolved to live the rest of his life out of the political power battlefield, Zhao stayed with a Luo Yang mafia. Though he tried his best to keep a low profile, his brilliance and ingenuity as a tactician still shined through, and led the gang to become one of the most influential in Luo Yang. This was his darkest and most pessimistic period; his misfortune took a further downward turn and brought him to imprisonment and a nearly successful sexual assault. Resolute to take his own life again, he was saved in the last minute by the man whom he least wanted to see. Although the reunion brought the two under the same campaign, Zhao was reluctant to accept help from Jiang. Little did he know in the month after he threw himself into the water, Jiang’s emotional attachment to him only grew stronger. Yet he stood firm and refused to open his heart to Jiang, as his last remaining bit of pride could not bear the shame of unequal status.

At this point of the story, Zhao’s character has been developed quite thoroughly; the attention started to shift to Jiang Yuan, the second lead character in the novel. Interestingly, this was not only a chance for readers to understand Jiang better, but also an opportunity for Jiang to finally learn how to love and care for someone. Jiang’s childhood was one without much personal affections. He was forced by his father to marry a woman who didn’t love him and vowed to kill him. His wife’s eventual betrayal orchestrated by his father aggravated father and son’s already strained relationship. Competition with his brothers, detachment from his mother, and aloofness from his son left him with no one to trust. Thirteen years of solitude rendered him incapable of loving, trusting, and caring. He was dark and reserved until he met Zhao.

Jiang’s attraction to Zhao was marked by twists and turns. He’s never met anyone so witty, radiant and mysterious at the same time. Zhao was unafraid to stand up to him, challenging Jiang’s ego because he was completely out of Jiang’s control. Curiousity and, of course, the apparent sexual attraction he had towards Zhao evoked the desire to care for someone for the first time in thirteen years. The real turning point of his feeling was after Zhao committed suicide. He felt enraged, for that someone dared to disobey him, and empty in his heart, for how he realized that he had lost someone very special. The persistent month-long search only intensified his feelings for Zhao, elevating simple attraction to possibly love. Upon finding Zhao, he changed his love-quest game plan (lol); he poured his heart out to care for Zhao because he knew Zhao will not only be his love-interest, but also a friend, an ally, and a companion for life.
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