FIRST FOR IF I WANTED
　　一·如我欲
　　-If I want，anything I can do.
　　-Expect death and love.
　　I \'m a rich girl.And beacause that,I was not popular in the children.They hated the rich\'s child,like me.I spent my childhood in the coutryside,my neighbor,a girl by the name of Helen,is my only friend.
　　She didn\'t look like kind,even a little cruel.But actuaclly she\'s a kind person with a warm-heart.
　　When I grow up,Helen and I begin our trip.We traveled around the world.The most unforgetable thing to me were coming.
　　We camped on a mountain.Because of my careless,I fell down from the high place.Helen was scared and give me a hand.She helped me stand on the ground again and give me a kiss.Though it on my face.My feeling was weird.I didn\'t know it until I know what\'s the word \"love\"means.
　　The happy time isn’t very long.I had a kind of bad disease,I can\'t stand quickly.Helen wanted to help me.So she asked my doctor for help.
　　…Our blood-type were matched,and the doctor give Helen and I an operation。Unfortunately，the operation failed.Though I lived,but I haven\'t wanted—my life is at a high price because Helen died!
　　To tell the truth,I\'m a rich girl.
　　Helen is,too.
　　The oppenents of her family\'s business wanted her to die.
　　So they give a lot of money to the doctor to make her dead.
　　After I can stand up,I send them to see the god.
　　They killed you,Helen.
　　You ought to live a healthy life,smile under the sun;you shouldn\'t sleep forever.
　　Every time I wish the dead one is me!
　　May.
　　I put a dozen daizy in front of your grave and said,\"Look,my friend.I can do anything I want now.Nothing can stop me. \"
　　EXCEPT DEATH AND LOVE.
　　“Ha…”
　　If the god can hear my voice,I want he can give you back to me.

　　SECOND FOR IF I TRIED
　　二·如我試
　　-If I tried,things may be better then.
　　When I saw Jack was around a group girls.I wanted to say,”What are you doing,MY BOYFRIEND”
　　Yes,Jack is my boyfriend,I fell in love with him one years ago.
　　I wanted to say my words,but as the matter of fact,I said nothing.I only standed and looked at him sadly.
　　Suddenly,he saw me,and said to me with his cold eyes,”Why did you come,Susan”
　　A girl was in his arms.
　　YOU SEX MANIAC!
　　I feel angry and sad,I wanted to fight with him,and say,“YOU ARE AS BAD AS YOU CAN BE!”But unfortunately,I did nothing.
　　And he comforted the girl who looked at me,:”Don’t worried ,my dear.”He said to me:”Hey,Susan。I remembered I \'ve said:we’re just friends.Don’t destory my life,OKWhat’s your mean that you come here”
　　FriendsI wanted to shout ,shout everyone ,help them know the man is what kind of person.But I only cried and rushed out from the hotel.
　　Why couldn’t he be an one-woman man
　　I was so sad,and I thought when I lied on my bed:
　　If I refused him at the beginning ,the thing would be much more better.At least better than now.
　　If I dumped him first,I wouldn’t hurt my heart that time.
　　If I realized him from his words,I wouldn’t cry that time.
　　If I tried,tried to throw the dirty word to him.That’s would show my confidence
　　If I tried ,tried to throw the dirty word to those girls.That could show Jack belonged to me
　　If I tried,tried to cry to show that how bad thing I suffered!That could let someone show me they standed on my side
　　I just know,I just want I can\'t see him anymore!

　　THIRD FOR IF I BELIEVED
　　三·如我信
　　-If I believed,I died a long years ago.
　　A girl asked to me:\"Do you know what\'s love\"
　　She\'s my last girlfriend.
　　WHAT\'S LOVEIt can be eaten
　　I don\'t believe it.In my opinion,money is better than love.
　　At the age of 11,I was cheated by my uncle on my father side.He wants me die.Though I was saved by the police,I never believed my family members any longer.
　　At the age of 21,Iwas cheated again by my second girlfriend.She leaved me with all my cards and money.Later,I didn\'t belie anyone from then on.
　　To my speak,this question is so funny.
　　There\'s no \"love\" in my dictionary.
　　I said to her:\"If I haven\'t had a lot of money and power,the girls,like you,will fall love with me
　　No.
　　If I believed the word‘love’ ,I would lost all the things I have now.So don\'t ask me this question,lady.\"
　　I dumped her,and plan to make a date with another girl.
　　Though somebody looked down upon me,I did the same thing I did in the past.

　　FOURTH FOR IF I FORGAVE
　　四·如我恕
　　-If I forgived,I could know he\'s alive.
　　He phoned me:\"I know I was wrong.Could you please forgive meI won\'t make that kind of mistake anymore:when I stay with you,I won\'t find others for one night.I promise you!I…\"
　　I hung up,smiled coldly，said to my self:\"It is no use crying over spilt milk.\"
　　What do you wantYou wants to be accepted the apoligy by me
　　DON\'T WISH!
　　I continued my life,paid no attention on him.But after a long time,I was phoned.
　　\"Are you Mr.Smith\"
　　\"This is Smith.Who\'s speaking there\"
　　\"This is GREEN HILL HOSPITAL,someone has dead.And his name is …\"
　　Is what
　　I arrived there,and saw him.
　　He becomed a buddy.
　　The police said he died by an terible accident.I found my cell phone.I’ve got a piece of message from him.
　　“I stay there wait for you forever,my lover.But you never pay attention to me.”
　　He wrote.But I,his boyfriend never noticed.
　　He died on an accident.
　　He wished and wished before.Now it\'s turns to me.I wished that if I forgived him…
　　-the end-

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